Latest Story

Conservationists Up In Arms Over Car Park

Friday, February 5, 2010
By Adam Douglas
Conservationists Up In Arms Over Car Park

Local historians and conservationists were today up in arms following a recent town council decision to repair the church car park in Eaton Socon. The car park has been in a terrible state for years and was closed by the council on safety grounds. However, local resident and chairman of the local history group Dorothy... »

St Neots Lynch Mob – Annual Dinner Dance

Tuesday, February 2, 2010
By Oi!! Correspondant
St Neots Lynch Mob – Annual Dinner Dance

This year’s annual dinner dance of the St Neots Lynch Mob and Glee Club will take place at The Little Thief Restaurant at the Black Cat Roundabout. “This will give... »

Mystery Chav Gets Restraining Order

Sunday, January 31, 2010
By Citizen Editor
Mystery Chav Gets Restraining Order

A mysterious chav who no-one can name or identify has been handed a restraining order to ensure he stays the fuck out of Dodge. In fact, commenters on a local... »

Two Year Restraining Order Placed On Eynesbury Councillor

Sunday, January 31, 2010
By Oi!! Correspondant

A two year restraining order has been placed on an Eynesbury councillor convicted of thinking in a public place. The councillor, who cannot be named, pleaded guilty to one case... »

Tesco Trials New Car Park

Saturday, January 30, 2010
By Citizen Editor
Tesco Trials New Car Park

Following a media furore this week when Tesco in Cardiff refused to allow a council estate dole queue mum into the store in her grotty pyjamas, the company are... »

All Council Decisions To Be Based On Facebook

Saturday, January 23, 2010
By Citizen Editor
All Council Decisions To Be Based On Facebook

Following national media coverage of the “St.Neots Needs A Cinema” Facebook group, St Neots Town Council today announced plans to base all future policies and decisions on Facebook groups. The... »

Police Keen To Blame All Crimes On Unique

Friday, January 22, 2010
By Citizen Editor
Police Keen To Blame All Crimes On Unique

Local law enforcers were today said to be glad that they had a scapegoat for every single crime committed in the five weeks that the Unique bar, on South... »

Local Schools Dubbed “Prison Playgrounds”

Sunday, January 17, 2010
By Benny T. Bean
Local Schools Dubbed “Prison Playgrounds”

Concerns were last week being raised by parents about the need for the fences that have been recently erected around our local schools. Spokeswoman for the parents association and town... »

Bus Stops Not Really Bus Stops

Saturday, January 16, 2010
By Oi!! Correspondant

Bus franchise firm Ragecoach, the operator of St Neots cross-town link service the Mighty X5, has confirmed today that it’s bus stop signage is not there to be helpful... »

Council Blamed For Less Snow

Wednesday, January 13, 2010
By Citizen Editor
Council Blamed For Less Snow

Huntingdonshire District Council were today under fire from St Neots residents, who claimed that St Neots was not getting it’s fair share of snow. The town’s location in a geographically... »

Snow Leads To Slew Of Stories

Thursday, January 7, 2010
By Tim C

Older people in St Neots have been making the most of this week’s snow by infuriating their children with stories of how it was much colder when they were... »

“No Such Thing As An Isolated Incident” Says Councillor

Friday, December 18, 2009
By Citizen Editor

Local councillor Steve van der Whitevanman hit out at claims that a man getting his ear bitten off and an attempted shooting at Unique this week were “isolated incidents”. “I... »

Council Praised For Innovative Eco-Friendly Lighting

Monday, December 7, 2009
By Citizen Editor

St Neots Town Council was today smiling all over its usual miserable face after the EU gave it a big pat on the back for the hundreds of eco-friendly... »

Councillors Excited About Starting School

Friday, December 4, 2009
By Citizen Editor

Childish local councillors Paul Marcel, Harry Shipman and Terrence Dougall were today reported to be excited about starting full-time primary education in the Spring term. Following revelations that the councillors... »

New Concept Guided Cinema Gets Go Ahead

Monday, November 30, 2009
By Oi!! Correspondant

St Neots is set to become the envy of market towns country wide with the installation of a new “Guided Cinema.” Following the lengthy planning process to find a... »

Confusion As No-One Sure If Christmas Lights Switched On

Saturday, November 28, 2009
By Citizen Editor
Confusion As No-One Sure If Christmas Lights Switched On

Local residents today expressed uncertainty as to whether last night’s “Big Switch On” had in fact gone ahead. The usual events surrounding the illuminations went ahead as planned yesterday (Friday),... »