"They're all CU**S" – Miles Spotted In Underpants!
The Citizen can exclusively report that “fragile” Councillor D Miles, 55, was yesterday escorted from the parapet of the town bridge by paramedics and police after being spotted by passers-by ranting and raving at no one in particular.
Wearing just a scabby old pair of Westgates own brand underpants, MIles was apparently heard to scream, “All I’ve done for them thankless shites, all the fucking time I’ve put into this god-forasken ring-piece of the universe. And what do I get? Fuck all, that’s what, fuck all! THEY’RE ALL CU**S!”
A spokeman for the Town Council refused to comment on the alledged incident but did say that Councillor Miles had unexpectedly taken a sabatical from office, and was expected to return to duties once the 72 hour “Place of Safety” order expired.
