62% Of Fog Stories "Utter Crap"
The recent foggy mornings in St Neots have led residents to spout the usual stories about what happened to them once in some really thick fog.
However, a study by the Chinese Whispers Distribution Depot has revealed that 62% of these are completely fictional, and the rest are lavishly embellished.
CWDD spokesman Beatty Broadband said, “As you know if there’s a rumour in St Neots that we didn’t start, we investigate it fully to decide whether it’s worth continuing. Hearing all these stories about fog got us thinking about how many were utter rhubarb.”
Broadband was shocked to find out that, amongst other things, Peter Bellingham, 41, of Parkway, had never accidentally driven into the river; Mavis Reerendum, 86, of Cambridge Gardens, had never parked in the centre of the road ten feet short of her garage “thinking she was home”; and HGV driver Simon Paul, 50, had never driven “all the way from Cambridge to Harrow at 85mph, unable to see more than three foot ahead.”
In fact, says Broadband, the only fog stories which did turn out to be true involved people getting pulled over by the police the next evening after accidentally leaving their fog lights switched on. “It’s quite disappointing really. I thought we had some really interesting misty mishaps in St Neots, but it turns out we live amongst over twenty thousands pathological liars.”
