Riverside Ripper Still On The Loose
St Neots dog walkers are living in fear this week as a reign of terror continues by an evil beast of a dog hell bent on attacking every animal on a lead it encounters. The Riverside Ripper also known as Mac The Knife prowls the well-worn and dog shit contaminated byways of this once beautiful town in search of prey.
The latest victims Mr Shaggy and his dog Scooby, still traumatised but able to talk, said “He came out of the fog like a mythical beast and sank his fangs deep into Scooby, there was nothing I could do as my hands were full of plastic bags of Scooby doo because I am a responsible dog owner.”
The beast was believed to be accompanied and a creepy old guy was seen heading back to the spooky looking house on the hill shouting, “And I would of gotten away with it if it wasn’t for those meddling kids.”
Mr Shaggy has sought the help of a local website in his bid to trace the owner. Local politician and one time dog whisperer Steve van der Van Driver has offered his services. Mr Van Driver said, “There are no bad dogs, just bad owners. It was probably that Fen tiger from before.” He then released his hounds to chase your Citizen reporter from his estate.
Fred, Daphne and Wilma were unavailable for comment.
Story by DK
