The EU has once again chosen Huntingdonshire as it’s testbed for a daft new rule. Under directive 09/447/EC, the terms “spitting distance” and “a stone’s throw” could soon be disappearing, particularly from promotional literature. EU spokesman Johann Rohan said today, “It is clear to me that St Neots is not “a stone’s throw” away from Cambridge.... »
Town councillor Steven van der Whitevanman today launched a campaign to ensure that a number of historical buildings in St Neots are not lost to redevelopment. A number of businesses and services have closed recently leaving an even higher number of empty shops and offices than usual. Many would consider these eyesores, but Whitevanman believes... »
St Neots councillors were left distraught after learning that the now infamous cross-street Christmas lights can no longer be erected over the High Street. In a surprise move local traders have decided the lights are simply too crap to display. The recent HSE report has been leaked in full to the Citizen with no bits... »
Now known as the Footbridge Complete Cock-up (FCC) plan local councillor Julie Wayward has had confirmation from Second Town Disconnect (STD) that far from being shelved the plan to separate Loves Farm residents from the rest of St Neots is set to go ahead. STD have confirmed that a “senior manager” with little responsibility had... »
A recent lack of tit-for-tat bickering between local councillors has left St Neots free papers with a lack of publishable letters. Indeed, the situation is so bad that in this weeks edition of the News, Crier and Something, there wasn’t a single letter from a councillor whinging about one of his or her colleagues. Editor Matt... »
Drug dealers in St Neots were today up in arms after the council announced it was to close South Street public conveniences. The grotty old bogs, whose odour can be detected as far away as Little Paxton, have long been a blight on the landscape of South Street, especially since all the shops and warehouses... »
Shocked residents from the shocking dormitory estate of Loves Farm have been shocked by the news that plans to build the bridge connecting them to the station have been shelved. “I’m shocked!” said Cambridge Road resident L. Tisley. “When I bought this place I was promised a cinema, a super-dooper health centre and bridge so... »
A dossier carelessly left in the Monkfield Arms pub by a representative of the Cambourne Parish Council on Monday afternoon contained documents referring to the preferred Travellers site, and astonishingly revealed the most likely site – the proposed golf course within Cambourne’s Country Park. An employee of the village’s building consortium, who preferred to remain... »
St Neots Town Council today got themselves all in a tizz over the news that a new site may be made available for their white elephant cinema project, as ATS Euromaster announced their Brook Street site would close. “Well that’d be ideal wouldn’t it,” said self-thinking Eynesbury councillor Terrence Dougall. “I thought the old fire... »
In a surprise move St Neots Town Council has voted in favour of renaming the town Huntingdon. Council leader Julia Wayward spoke exclusively to The Citizen. “St Neots has often been neglected because all our money goes to Huntingdon, but by renaming the town we felt those fuckwits at District would put more money our... »
