Citizen Editor In New “iPlod” Scandal!
Controversial Citizen editor Tim C. has again upset the establishment with a blatant disregard for some rule or law or something. Fresh from upsetting the entire population of Truman Town (Cambourne), Mr C. has been roasted alive by local law enforcement officers for “listening” to stuff.
By his own admission our illustrious editor was simply cycling along when he was intercepted by the recently formed Special iPlod Group (SiG) and given “a good talking to” for listening to “Now That’s What I Call Fen Folk Tunes I.”
Inspector Perry Grafham commented, “Chas & Dave – yes. Max Bygraves – yes. Pam Ayres – yes. Folk stuff – NO! We have enough trouble with trendy Goths and Post Modern Mods listening to stuff that went out with the Ark. We don’t want all this traditional rubbish creeping in too.”
We asked the Inspector about the safety aspects of listening on the move. “It’s bloomin’ irresponsible, we’ve got grannies blasting out Oasis, Blur clogging up the ears of our less able and kids downloading all that crap from the seventies. Our remit is to ensure quality ‘listening’ applicable to the area’s social demographic, it’s Chas and Dave or nothing.”
We asked about safety again…then gave up.
Noel Edmonds was unavailable for comment.
