Local Schools Dubbed “Prison Playgrounds”
Concerns were last week being raised by parents about the need for the fences that have been recently erected around our local schools.
Spokeswoman for the parents association and town busybody Ms. Thorninside attacked the decision to envelope school playgrounds with metal wire fences at a council meeting, saying “It surely is not necessary to cage our children within school grounds in this manner.” She went on to describe theses changes as creating “…prison playgrounds.”
Local Councillor Mr Whitevanman responded stating “How else do you expect us to keep the little fuckers in?”
The furore has escalated still further this week and has even resulted in questions being raised in Parliament. The Secretary for Education, Ostrich Headinsand MP, when questioned by the opposition on the Government’s decision to take such measures, responded in surprisingly candid fashion saying, “Everyone knows that the modern curriculum is a pile of bollocks designed to churn out a generation of morainic, illiterate kidults while simultaneously increasing national pass rates. We are already stretching public opinion dangerously thin, so much so that even the ritalin-infested youth can smell the bullshit a mile off. This is the only obvious solution to stop the youngsters from escaping state-sponsored brainwashing. I mean, we can’t have children that are capable of thinking and learning for themselves can we? Where would that leave us?”
Out of a job this reporter would contend.
The debate rages on.
