Your Premier Local News Resource
Friday December 15th 2017

‘Opinion’ Microfiche

7-Day Forecast

7-Day Forecast

The Citizen brings you up-to-the-minute weather information from Michael Shark. Friday is the thirteenth, which is unlucky for some. Rain will be interspersed with bright spells just long enough to make you think it might be summer. It’s not. You’ll need to [Read More]

Citizen Welcomes New Inappropriate Correspondent

Citizen Welcomes New Inappropriate Correspondent

The Citizen will tomorrow welcome it’s newest team member, Zebastiaan von Fritzl. Zebastiaan will take the role of Inappropriate Correspondent, reporting on all the less-than-savoury news items that flap their way across our desks. Zebastiaan von Fritzl was born in [Read More]

Citizen Waves Goodbye To Draper

Citizen Waves Goodbye To Draper

The Citizen is sad to announce that Politics and International Correspondant, Don Draper, is leaving to pursue other methods of buying ecstasy. Draper has only been reporting for the Citizen for a short time, but during this period has broken the lid off a lot of stories [Read More]

Editor Jabs Contributors Into Shape

Editor Jabs Contributors Into Shape

The St Neots Citizen editor Tim C today apologised for lack of editorial control during the traditional late August slow relaunch. “There have been some, shall we say, quality issues,” stated C this morning, “which I have resolved by throwing small stones [Read More]

Bienvenue le Faches-Thumesnil Citizen!

Bienvenue le Faches-Thumesnil Citizen!

Dans les actualités qui la plupart des gens ne comprendront pas, le Citizen sera publié en français pour le bénéfice de notre “ville jumelle”, Faches-Thumesnil. Le banlieue inutiles, qui fait partie de Lille, près de la frontière belgique, manque un [Read More]

Meet The Team

Meet The Team

We thought it was time we revealed a little behind the famous names you see up in that there byline as you get your daily(ish) intake of local news from premier rag the St Neots Citizen. Editor Tim C The Citizen Editor lives in Citizen Towers, on the town’s luxurious [Read More]

St Neots Citizen Welcomes Don Draper

St Neots Citizen Welcomes Don Draper

The St Neots Citizen today introduces new Politics & International reporter Don Draper. Don will travel the world on a budget of zero and report on international events and how they may affect you, the St Neots resident. “Everything has repurcussions for the best [Read More]

“Have Today Off” Says Editor

“Have Today Off” Says Editor

St Neots Citizen editor Tim C today said that everyone could have the day off. “It’s my birthday, I feel really old and I’m going out to get pissed,” said the local media mogul who turns something-in-the-late-twenties today. “I’ve [Read More]

A Day In The Life…

A Day In The Life…

Local professional benefit scrounger James Bryson, 22, gives a valuable insight into the life of the permanently unemployed. [Read More]

Citizen Sorry For Fire Gaffe

Citizen Sorry For Fire Gaffe

The Citizen would like to offer genuine apologies for an earlier story entitled “Eastsiders keep warm with big fire”. The story was sent in by a contributor, and before posting it I personally emailed that contributor to ask what was on fire. He responded, [Read More]

 Page 1 of 2  1  2 »

This Just In

Town Gears Up For New Complaint

Town Gears Up For New Complaint

Neotians were this week beginning to prepare for 2014′s predicted favourite sport – namely, complaining [Read More]

Councillor Definitely Didn’t Say Nazi

Councillor Definitely Didn’t Say Nazi

District and county councillor Steve van der Whitevanman caused controversy this week after he definitely didn’t [Read More]

Shocking Horse Meat Truth Revealed

Shocking Horse Meat Truth Revealed

Meat experts have today shocked the British public with the real reason behind the horse DNA contamination scandal. [Read More]

Paper Reveals Reporterless Setup

Paper Reveals Reporterless Setup

Local newspaper the Cambridge Evening News In The Morning has revealed that it is going to sack all its reporters, [Read More]

New School Thief-Proof

New School Thief-Proof

South Cambs DC have revealed that new secondary school Cambourne Village College is designed with special anti-theft [Read More]

Microfiche

Subscribe