Tag Archive
Council Praised For Innovative Eco-Friendly Lighting
St Neots Town Council was today smiling all over its usual miserable face after the EU gave it a big pat on the back for the hundreds of eco-friendly Christmas light displays installed in the town centre. Despite popular belief that almost no lights have been put up following a massive balls-up two years... »
Confusion As No-One Sure If Christmas Lights Switched On
Local residents today expressed uncertainty as to whether last night’s “Big Switch On” had in fact gone ahead. The usual events surrounding the illuminations went ahead as planned yesterday (Friday), including a rubbish fair with about four rides, and displays from various local dance troupes and suchlike. But Grosvenor Gardens resident and former manager... »
Shock As Citizen Avoids Predictable Christmas Lights Story
Readers were shocked today as the Citizen avoided publishing a predicatable story about St Neots’ rubbish festive illuminations. Editor Tim C said, “You couldn’t make it up really, so why even try? “Over the past few years we have had increasingly awful Christmas lights displays, ever since that one gantry fell down on some... »
The Lights Go Down
St Neots councillors were left distraught after learning that the now infamous cross-street Christmas lights can no longer be erected over the High Street. In a surprise move local traders have decided the lights are simply too crap to display. The recent HSE report has been leaked in full to the Citizen with no... »
Leaked Report Reveals Nothing About Christmas Lights
A long-awaited report from the Health & Safety Executive regarding 2007's Christmas lights incident, in which a pedestrian was struck by half a ton of metal falling from above the High Street, contains absolutely no new information. The report, which the Council have been awaiting for a year now, was expected to conclude the H&SE's... »
Solicitors Disappointed With Christmas Lights
Local injury compensation specialists Win Just Over £7000, LLP have revealed their disappointment with this year’s Christmas lights in the town. Partner Irma Konnman said that his firm had laid on extra staff in the High Street and Market Square last Friday in order to ambulance-chase any victims of falling rigs and masonry. But... »
Council Plans To Alter Passage Of Time
St Neots Town Council are hoping to alter time and possibly reality, by staging the 2007 Christmas lights switch-on this week. Last year, there was no lighting ceremony after a set of lights fell on a pedestrian’s head. But a spokesman for the council today said that rather than just leave 2007′s decorations as... »
Town Council Announce Christmas Lights Theme
The town council has announced its themes for this years Christmas lights display. Cllr Miles commented today, “In keeping with last years events and one of the big films this year, it is announced that the theme will be Indiana Jones.” When questioned on the local aspect of the theme, Cllr Miles replied “If... »
Christmas Lights "Big Switch-On" This Week
St Neots Town Council has announced that the big switch on will be taking place next Friday, 25th July. Dean Dexter, a spokesperson from the Town Council, said “we are absolutely delighted to be switching the lights on next week as it will really help boost trade in the town centre in the run up... »
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