Dans les actualités qui la plupart des gens ne comprendront pas, le Citizen sera publié en français pour le bénéfice de notre “ville jumelle”, Faches-Thumesnil. Le banlieue inutiles, qui fait partie de Lille, près de la frontière [Click to read more...]
Newly-local epic cyclist Martin Walsh today sent word that Faches Thumesnil is “rather disappointing”. Standing outside a newsagents on Rue Henri Barbusse in the Lille suburb, Walsh stated that although pleased to have completed the [Click to read more...]
Newly local man Martin Walsh, planning a charity bike ride to Beirut in Lebanon, has revealed that the city is “not actually a warzone”. People have recently called Martin “fucking mental” for attempting the epic journey [Click to read more...]
This year’s annual dinner dance of the St Neots Lynch Mob and Glee Club will take place at The Little Thief Restaurant at the Black Cat Roundabout. “This will give us great view of drivers knocking people off bikes and things, and [Click to read more...]
Controversial Citizen editor Tim C. has again upset the establishment with a blatant disregard for some rule or law or something. Fresh from upsetting the entire population of Truman Town (Cambourne), Mr C. has been roasted alive by local law [Click to read more...]
Following complaints from "Mothers against furious cycling" at a council surgery, plans are being implemented to slow down cyclists in the High Street. Sharon Kiley, a local mother, said "I saw one of these mainiacs ride straight over a crisp [Click to read more...]
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