Tag Archive
ADHD Girl Apologises To Hoodies – Puppy Still Dead
Disgraced former puppy owner May Marston was today facing calls to apologise to local hoodies after blaming them for the death of her dog – which in fact died of natural causes. Marston appeared in several national newspapers and was the subject of a widely-supported Facebook group after she alledged that local yobs kicked... »
Hoodies Help Town Live Up To Expectations
Unknown hoodies this week made sure St Neots lived up to it’s regional – and indeed now national – reputation as “a bit of a shithole” by stamping a small dog to death. Not content with rumours that the town is made up of inter-marrying cousins, and that the clap is airbourne in Eynesbury,... »
Entrepreneurs Relocate To Area
The BBC today announced that its popular show Dragons Den will be relocated to a farm just outside Ramsey – and renamed Dragons Fen. The TV Dragons, all millionaires, currently convene weekly in a London warehouse with an pointless economics reporter and massive clock in the basement. However, due to the credit crunch they... »
Local Man Fails At Dragon's Den
Local entrepreneur has failed to impress BBC2′s Dragons with his latest invention, SatChav. Eaton Socon man Darren Feave, 28, designed SatChav to assist local criminals in escaping when in unfamiliar areas. “Ya know what it’s like, like,” said Feave. “You’re runnin dahn the road wiv a telly an’ you take a wrong turn through... »
St Neots Town Centre "Safe" Complains Local Man
St Neots has unexpectedly been declared “Safe” after a local resident travelled the length of the High Street – and back again – without incident. Theloneius P. Staker, of Eaton Ford, said, “This morning I have walked up and down the High Street, both sides. I have not been hit by a single... »
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