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Posts Tagged ‘Police’

News & That Gets New Rozzer Picture

News & That Gets New Rozzer Picture

Regular readers of the online edition of the Cambridge Used-To-Be-In-The-Evening News were today shocked to discover a new standard police image on a story about something to do with a road. Traditionally, the website is too lazy to take pictures of [Click to read more...]

Chav Superhighway Funding Exclusive

Chav Superhighway Funding Exclusive

As the bridge is opened over the Great Ouse, St Neots Citizen has uncovered the missing funding donor for the Eynesbury to Eatons Chav Superhighway. It appears that the unaccounted-for money, to the tune of a Rowley Million, has been put forward [Click to read more...]

Chavs Rubbish At Rioting

Chavs Rubbish At Rioting

St Neots teens have tried and completely failed to start a riot in a copycat incident following disturbances in London and around the UK this week. Angry fourteen-year-olds – up to five of them – gathered on the Market Square last night [Click to read more...]

St Neots Girls Mistaken For Stevenage Scum

St Neots Girls Mistaken For Stevenage Scum

St Neots girls were yesterday refused entry to the entire town of Stevenage after a case of mistaken identity led bouncers to believe they were pub-smashing ruffians. [Click to read more...]

Local Chavs Terrified Of Gun-Wielding Nans

Local Chavs Terrified Of Gun-Wielding Nans

Hoodie yobs in St Neots report they are scared to leave their own homes after gangs of knife-happy pensioners began roaming the streets. Reports in local rags of a “grey crime-wave” only hint at the daily abuse suffered by local teens at [Click to read more...]

Everyone Misses War

Everyone Misses War

Residents surprised and divided over new scrap [Click to read more...]

Police Reveal New Crimefighting Weapon

Police Reveal New Crimefighting Weapon

Hoodie asbo twats are to be tackled by an army of dangerous 'Supernans' [Click to read more...]

No-One Surprised As Eastside Tops Crime Charts

No-One Surprised As Eastside Tops Crime Charts

Residents of Eaton Ford and Eaton Socon today expressed a lack of surprise that down-at-heel neighbour Eynesbury topped the crime statistics in a new “street-level crime map” by the police. Rozzers caused consternation in Cambridge when [Click to read more...]

Police Warn Of Sale Scam

Police Warn Of Sale Scam

Police are warning of increased fake church fundraisers... [Click to read more...]

Mystery Chav Gets Restraining Order

Mystery Chav Gets Restraining Order

A mysterious chav who no-one can name or identify has been handed a restraining order to ensure he stays the fuck out of Dodge. In fact, commenters on a local web forum were today at a loss to describe the person who has only been described in the [Click to read more...]

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