Your Premier Local News Resource
Saturday May 25th 2013

Posts Tagged ‘Pubs’

St Neots Minutes Ahead

St Neots Minutes Ahead

Local councillors have teamed up with “Expert Scientists” in an attempt to attract new businesses to the town’s increasingly empty industrial estates. In a statement today (Thursday), council leader Julia Wayward revealed that, despite sitting to the west [Read More]

“Save EMA” Say Off-Licenses

“Save EMA” Say Off-Licenses

Proprietors of the town’s booze retailers today renewed calls on the Government to overturn last week’s decision to scrap Education Maintenance Allowance. The payment of up to £30 a week was introduced by Labour to encourage teens from poorer backgrounds to [Read More]

Nights Out Traditionally Crap Claims Historian

Nights Out Traditionally Crap Claims Historian

Local historians were today hailing the recent radar mapping of the old Priory site a success having discovered several important artefacts. Unearthed Artefacts dating back over 500 years were removed from the site to be catalogued at the nearby Council offices. Famous [Read More]

Council Have New Site For Cinema

Council Have New Site For Cinema

St Neots Town Council today got themselves all in a tizz over the news that a new site may be made available for their white elephant cinema project, as ATS Euromaster announced their Brook Street site would close. “Well that’d be ideal wouldn’t it,” [Read More]

Surprise As Club Shuts After 11 Months

Surprise As Club Shuts After 11 Months

Rubbish St Neots club Worx closed its doors last week, after the credit crunch apparently drove residents to drink at home. Ignoring the fact that the Priory seemed to be busy as ever, a spokesman for Teeth-Moss Entertainment, who own the venue in the former Job Centre as [Read More]

New Facebook Blamed For Pub Disappearance

New Facebook Blamed For Pub Disappearance

The new layout of social networking site Facebook, launched earlier this year, has been blamed for the recent disappearance of listed Eaton Socon pub The Bell. Thousands of users got very upset when the site made using the new layout compulsory, when previously they could [Read More]

KFC Rumours Renewed

KFC Rumours Renewed

A popular St Neots rumour, regarding KFC building a fast-food restaurant on the site of the Bell in Eaton Socon, has resurfaced in this weeks local press. Dale E. Goszyp, of the St Neots Chinese Whispers Distribution Depot, said, “We’ve been perpetuating this [Read More]

Pub Relocated According To Residents

Pub Relocated According To Residents

Locals were surprised to read in a local paper this week that the Waggon and Horses, which last week was “accidentally” turned into a drive-thru, is apparently now located in Nelson Road. The front page of the Town Crier this week carried a story covering [Read More]

First Drive-Thru Pub Opens In St Neots

First Drive-Thru Pub Opens In St Neots

Eaton Socon pub the Waggon & Horses has become the UK’s first drive-thru pub, attracting controversy from anti-drink-drive campaigners. “Well,” said Peter Guinness, a spokesman for Pubmaster, “We noticed a lack of drive-thru’s in St Neots [Read More]

Tesco “Not Mothership”

Tesco “Not Mothership”

Tesco have denied claims that their St Neots store is an alien craft after Parklands residents reported an eerie green glow. The St Neots store was recently refurbished, and was advertised as being the first in the country to get the new “green glass” look. But [Read More]

This Just In

Shocking Horse Meat Truth Revealed

Shocking Horse Meat Truth Revealed

Meat experts have today shocked the British public with the real reason behind the horse DNA contamination scandal. [Read More]

Paper Reveals Reporterless Setup

Paper Reveals Reporterless Setup

Local newspaper the Cambridge Evening News In The Morning has revealed that it is going to sack all its reporters, [Read More]

New School Thief-Proof

New School Thief-Proof

South Cambs DC have revealed that new secondary school Cambourne Village College is designed with special anti-theft [Read More]

Champagne Shoplifter “Had No Taste”

Champagne Shoplifter “Had No Taste”

Local supermarket managers have spoken out about the recent spate of theft of sparkly French booze, revealing that the [Read More]

Shock At Lasagne Meat Content

Shock At Lasagne Meat Content

St Neots’ frozen food connoisseurs were outraged today after it was revealed that some Findus lasagnes may only [Read More]

Microfiche

Subscribe