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Thursday July 18th 2019

What Price Luxury?

i-am-a-thief-i-stole-from-walmart-shoplifting-sign1Dear Uncle Dave,

I have a rather interesting dilemma.

I have recently found reason to suspect that my teenage son has been thieving from a large supermarket on the Eastside. I was completely oblivious to the fact he was doing this and assuming that the Finest Wine, Finest Cheese and Other of the Finest products were simply substitutions for others I had ordered.

It was only when I attempted to clean his room when I found the evidence, the rather expensive Radox shower gel for men.

How can I tell if he is stealing or if it’s just my crazy imagination?

Worried Jan A.

 Dear Worried Jan

You are not crazy. Your boy is a little tea-leaf.

The supposed substituted items could well be – ignoring for the moment that fact that you’ve never done an online shop in your life. But shower gel in a teenager’s bedroom? What a giveaway. He will stop at nothing – shop him to the rozzers now, quick, before it’s too late!

Although, on second thoughts, why not wait until his drug habit, funded by his petty crime spree, leads him to dealing, and then demand 50% of the proceeds?

Uncle Dave

Dave has been snooping in others lives from an early age. Sticking his nose into others business and ensuring that his point of view is put across. This lead Uncle Dave to believe that he is experienced enough to write an agony uncle column.


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